The last couple of months have been very difficult and strange, for me impossible to put fully into words. I pretty much abandoned the blog here simply because it’s hard to get my thoughts in order. I also didn’t want Matt’s photos to no longer be on the first page of Mmm… Yarn or my Flickr account but now that I finally printed and framed a few photos it’s OK and I’m no longer freaking out at the thought of those no longer being first in those places. Having all digital photos means I don’t put in the effort of printing and framing anymore so there were no photos of him or us anywhere. On a side note, I learned you can take screen shots with the iPhone, which allowed me to keep a screen shot of our last text message exchange as a .jpg file, which means I’m also no longer freaking out over his phone’s battery going dead or getting some software update that deletes saved stuff.

My brain is all over the place and rambling thoughts abound. I do go to work 4 days a week, off Wednesdays, and thank goodness we are now busy with a computer lease turnover and an upgrade to Office 2007. Both of these projects can focus my mind for the duration of the workday. Then I go home and it’s rambling time again.

But back to the blog. For a while I had nothing to show you here as I did not have any knitting mojo for a little over a month after he died. Since then I have been able to concentrate enough to knit simple projects and even a few not so simple ones but haven’t had the wherewithal for dealing with photographing, writing down my notes (now of course all forgotten anyway), and getting things up on the blog.

So, here is the first object that I managed to finish and photograph, the baby sweater you saw back in early May. Last month I wove in its 10 remaining yarn ends and sewed on the buttons; I even mailed it off to its little (and growing) recipient.

Pullover_Baby_2009_06_10_BlueStripes_Mikey

Pattern: own
Yarn: Blue Sky Alpacas Organic Cotton, 100% cotton, .75 skeins color 632 (dark blue), .65 skeins color 630 (mint green), .25 skeins color 80 (off-white)
Buttons: from stash (I have these in several colors and really like them)
Needles: size 6
Size: 6-9 months
Started 5/5 and finished 6/10/2009

I did not hear from the parents whether they received it at all and therefore do not know whether it fits or they like it. This has happened to me with I’d say 80% of the things I’ve mailed off, gifts that I did not give in person. I don’t take it personally as I know new parents are busy and frazzled and probably use baby’s naptime to quickly nap themselves or try to get something done in the house, but I still find it disheartening to not at least get an email saying “it arrived.”

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